Morning sounds, birds awake, whistling is pleasant,
Rising early beats sleeping late always when your working.
Morning dew looks so cool kind of want to drink it,
The rising sun feels so warm I invite for you to meet it.
– Thomas M. Watt
Chipper feelings feeling good
Sweating more then I probably should
Working hard working late editing sure takes the cake
Mundane work oh yes it is yet still it is so important
What to wear what to say what to do I’m done today
Making my book fresh and tight fixing that shit ’till that shit’s right
Running hard walking fast thinking quickly what’s next task
Creating website here it goes soon the time comes to expose
What I’ve been doing with my life the reason I’ve spent a year inside
The truth is coming so get ready the book is close to being pretty
See the truth evolve from lies in this series I’ll grow your eyes
Soon you will see what’s divine soon I’ll show the world it’s very own lie
Starting steady so it goes the world still don’t even know
Just you wait just wait and see what I’ve written will be read and seized
It is coming almost here tell the worldly they all should fear
The book of days the book of all, “The Way of the World” is what it’s called.
– Thomas M. Watt
(Reporters all checking their watches. McWatty9 has been very much delayed. The news is the once relentless leader is calling it a career. His posts have ceased to be as frequent as usual, and are currently bordering on occasional, at best. Bill and Snobert are snickering together, sharing nibbles of the same peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Aaron is wearing a nice suit again, with the same pair of white underwear banded tightly over his head. McWatty9 exits from behind the red curtain, wearing a plain orange tee-shirt, denim jeans, and boater shoes. He stands before the podium.)
McWatty9 – Ladies and gentlemen of Wattie Nation, I’m pleased to inform you this kingdom has not yet ceased to expand. We are growing in popularity each and everyday, racking up new followers by the post. I’ve been posting a lot of poetry as of late, and it is beginning to garner me critical acclaim. Not only that, but I’m beginning to get contacted by outside publications in order to post for them, a feat I am very much proud of. I have also formed a friendship with Ayse Juaneda, the greatest artist in the world, and I’m super stoked about that. Sharplittlepencil has apparently left us, as I haven’t heard from our strongest supporter in some time now. And I spoke to president Everything Iz Great just a few minutes ago, who was pleased to inform me that his servants are super duper happy for me. Now then, the floor is open for questioning.
Bill – (Shooting out from his chair) McWatty9, remember the time I warned you saying you wouldn’t be able to post ten times a day? Remember remember? Well you said you would, and now you’re not!
McWatty9 – (Lowering head) Yes, yes. Bill, I’m reluctant to say you are right. I’ve been very busy editing my book and dealing with some personal issues, but still, this is no excuse for not providing my followers with an adequate number of post.
Bill – Suck-it, McWatty9!! (BIll sits down, shares a loud high five with Snobert)
McWatty9 – (Sighing) Alright, anything else?
Aaron – (Flipping underwear band up and out the way of his eyes, doesn’t bother to stand in order to ask question) McWatty9, how would you like to go to a bonfire tomorrow night?
McWatty9 – (Fist pumps) Yeah, that sounds great! I would love that!
Aaron – Great! Just grab a date and meet me there.
McWatty9 – (Pressing buttons in cellphone) Alright! Sweet! I’m stoked, just hold on one second… and… alright… wait for it… sweet! This awesome chick I know said she’d be down!
Aaron – Yeah?
McWatty9 – Yeah man! Thanks for inviting me. Who’s your date?
Aaron – Oh I don’t have one. But see if you can grab another one.
McWatty9 – …Are you kidding?
Aaron – No. (Munches on giant cheeseburger, speaks while chewing) Go on though. (More chewing) See how many people you can get. I want this to be a big deal.
McWatty9 – (Frowning slightly) Alright. Well, thanks everyone for coming. We’ll be in touch… I guess. (Begins to walk away from podium)
Snobert – Hey Mcwatty9!
McWatty9 – (Turning glumly) Yeah?
Snobert – SUCK IT!
McWatty9 – (Nods weakly, drags his feet, disappears behind red curtain)
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