Master Update – 10/18

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Waddup, waddup.

Haven’t been posting as frequently as usually. That’s mainly due to finishing up edits and preparing for the release of Master.

First thing’s first – I need to be %100 convinced the book is worth pushing. So far, the feedback I’ve received has been overwhelmingly positive. Nonetheless, I’m still adjusting a few minute details and polishing it off each and everyday. I want to receive another round of reviews before I decide there’s no more changes to make. I’m seeking out well-read individuals who are willing to race through it and give me a basic, overall perspective of the book (If you’re interested, drop me a note in the comment section. No special knowledge required).

Once I have the novel completely ready to go, there’s still a lot of work to do – send it out to book review blogs, hype it up across the web, and honestly, just promote the hell out of it.

There used to be this small burger joint in town. Hole-in-wall type place. First time I went entered I took a look at the menu, then decided to grab lunch at the Subway next door. A while later I gave it another visit, and let me tell ya – it was the best goddamn burger I ever tasted. Third time I couldn’t even get in – Place was boarded up, there was no more burger joint.

What’s the point of this story?

That burger joint kicked the shit out of its competition. But nobody was aware, because people are always reluctant to try something new. That first burger purchase took a leap of faith by me, but by God I’m happy I devoured it.

Master is essentially my first novel. It’s the first time I’ve put something together that people will enjoy reading – like that burger I was fortunate enough to sink my teeth into. So I plan on marketing the hell out of it, but want to be absolutely sure it’ll be worth the time and effort. I’m expecting to generate a whole bunch of downloads and sales early. If readers like what they see, then word of mouth will help the book spread.

The equation is simple – product x push = success. I think Einstein won a prize for that one. But if you don’t have a good product, or neglect pushing it, you can never achieve the success you’re looking for. That’s my theory, at least.

As for this blog, I know I’ve been MIA for the past few days. That’s because I want to get this book hot-and-ready, that way I can put out an official release date and blog the first few chapters leading up to it. I want you to know I’m not just blowing steam up your… who blows steam, anyway?

Stay tuned, I’ll keep you posted.

  • Thomas M. Watt

Sunshine Blogger Award

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That’s right ladies and gentlemen, I have been nominated for not one, but TWO sunshine blogger awards. Many thanks to both lovely ladies, Jennifer Calvert and Karina Pinella. I have received a grand total of sixteen questions to answer. Due to my smart-ass nature, I’ve elected to answer them in a press conference format, along with two of my other personalities. Make sure to read through to the bottom, because I’ve nominated 5 others for the award along with my own list of questions. Without further ado, I bring you the joint press conference.

  • * *

Three candidates take the stage simultaneously. Standing at the podium on the right is Thomas M. Watt, who takes a sip from his bottled water then adjusts his microphone. The middle podium belongs to McWatty9, whose devilish smile and fiery eyes are enough to prompt any parents to put their children to bed early. Hunching over the third podium and breathing with his mouth open is Henry Huerto, and it appears he forgot to brush some potato chip remnants off his t-shirt.

“Any a you idiots got a question?” says McWatty9.

Most journalists lower their hands and take up their pens. A woman in a purple blouse speaks up.

“Who are your favorite published authors?” she asks.

“Great question,” says Thomas. “I’ve always enjoyed anything written by John Steinbeck, but some of his work stirs me emotionally, particularly East of Eden. I tend to shy away from anything that hits too close to home, so I’ve never been able to finish that book. Right now I’m really into Vince Gilligan-”

“Lady asked about published authors dipshit, not television writers,” says McWatty9.

Thomas nods. “Yes, I’m aware. Thing is, his shows include so many awesome plot twists and feature strong, dynamic characters. I really enjoyed The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Steig Larsson, so I guess I should include him, too.”

Man with a hawaiian button-down shoots up from his seat. “What did you want to grow up to accomplish in your life?”  Other journalist raise their eyebrows at him. He gradually sits back down.

“A lot,” says Henry Huerto. “But you know, I didn’t do any of it. I guess I’m just a loser…”

You could hear crickets. Every person in the room avoids eye contact with Henry.

“Right, uhh, what are your favorite Movies?” says a journalist.

“The one I made with your mom,” says McWatty9. “And it’s about how we made you-”

“I’ll answer that,” says Thomas, racing to grab his mic.

“‘Cause I boned her,” says McWatty9.

“Favorite movies,” says Thomas. “I’d have to say the Matrix tops my list. The moment when Neo stands up after being shot dead inspires me every time. I watched Silence of the Lambs recently, that was an incredible body of work. Also enjoyed se7en, especially the ending – it’s funny how much of an impact the ending of a film has on your overall impression of the movie.”

“If you got to choose your last meal in life, what would it be?” asks a reporter.

“Hot cheetos and a gatorade,” says Henry.

“You a teenage girl?” says McWatty9.

“No… that just sounds good right now.”

“Ya know where the Brooklyn bridge’s at?”

“Yea,” says Henry.

“Good. Go there and Jump off it.”

“Next question,” says Thomas.

An eight year old girl wearing a backpack stands up. “What is your favorite… temperature?”

McWatty9 jumps to respond: “Eighteen hundred degrees.”

Room falls silent.

“Why?” asks Thomas.

“Because that’s the temperature I’m gonna have Henry cremated at.”

“Introvert or Extrovert?” asks a journalist.

Thomas answers. “Introvert, for sure. I like people, but I feel the majority of social gatherings are pointless and irrelevant. People respond to you better when you’re successful anyway, so I’d rather pour my time into whatever skill I’m currently trying to develop. Currently that’s writing… besides, no matter what group of people I spend time with, they inevitably begin bashing some other person who doesn’t conform to their group. I genuinely hate that, and the more I open my mouth I discover I’m a disagreeable person. My mind is always working toward fixing some kind of problem. Interactive, or extroverted people put a lot of time and effort into their relationships. I put mine into stories.”

Media members nod.

“What are your favorite past times?” asks a young women with a low-cut top.

“You,” says McWatty9.

Thomas clears his throat. “If I’m going to be honest, I have to say I don’t care much for any hobbies or endeavors that don’t bring me closer to my long-term goals. I have an obsessive, addictive personality, and don’t live anything close to a balanced life… So I have to say none.”

“What about yourself would you change, if you could?”

Henry grabs his mic. “Self doubt, paranoia, overthinking. Emotions get the better of me. I hate myself.”

An unsettling silence comes over the crowd.

“Brooklyn bridge,” says McWatty9, through a cough.

“What scares you the most?”

Thomas answers. “I hate spiders.”

“Bet ya like turtles,” says McWatty9.

Another journalists stands. “Why do you blog?”

“I like to see the responses I get to my stories. It’s a free way to get feedback, and an easy way to tell whether I’m putting out quality work. For a long time, people only seemed to enjoy the poems I would post. My short stories have only recently began to entertain my followers, and I’m really thrilled about that… for a long time, I couldn’t pay people to read my work.”

Guy with a rasta cap shouts: “Who is your favorite musician?”

Thomas says, “Currently I alternate between Eminem and Coldplay. Chris Martin is a genius, but I have mad respect for Eminem, especially because I relate to his struggle to make something of himself. He faced a lot of adversity and didn’t have much support. I should add that Ocean by John Butler Trio is the most beautiful song in the world.”

“How do you feel about awards?” says a teenager with zits.

“Same as I feel ’bout you,” says McWatty9.

“What is your favorite dessert?” says a big guy with a mustache.

“Um, I kind of like good and plenty,” says Henry. “I don’t know, those sound good right now… Does anybody have some I could share?”

Crickets.

“What makes your world rock?” says the young woman with the low-cut top. She bites the end of her pen.

“Dreams of the future,” says Thomas. “That always beats my current reality.”

“Waddup,” says the guy with the rasta cap. “Favorite music?”

Thomas grins and answers: “Similar to my taste for cinema and novels. When something is well written, it speaks to you. I don’t limit myself to any one genre, I’m more a fan of the individual artist.”

“How important is it to you to be a famous writer?” blurts out a father.

“I’m happy just to write,” says Thomas, before scratching the back of his head, then biting his lips. “Actually, it’s everything to me. That’s what I want to do with my life.”

The moderator walks out onto the stage, and claps his hands. “Ok folks, thank you all for joining us. That’ll be the end of the questions, so… get the hell out!”

  • * *

Now for my 5 nominees, and my ten questions. If you are nominated, you have to answer these… your wordpress contract obligates you under penalty of prison time, in case you never read the small print when you signed up. My nominees are:

  1. Storytime with John – Kid’s a natural. He’s up there with A Opinionated Man (see below).
  2. Ben Myatt – Writes bad ass characters, though his latest post has me concerned.
  3. Kevin Cooper – Ally of indie authors everywhere, great person and writer of the Miedo series.
  4. A Opinionated Man – King of internet blogs, far too big to bother with this.
  5. Ray M. Meadows – Fantastic writer and confrontational twitter-er

And the questions I have for you:

  1. If you could instantly learn any one skill set (i.e. fly a plane, fix an engine, surf), what would it be?
  2. It’s a beautiful, bright sunny day. What are your plans?
  3. Neighbor’s dog defecates right outside your front door. How do you respond?
  4. You just won the lottery. What’s the first thing you do?
  5. What do you think of these questions so far?
  6. I disagree. State something that most people consider completely normal that always feels bizarre to you.
  7. Zombie apocalypse – Which personality are you in your group of survivors?
  8. Do you regret accepting this award?
  9. Why do you blog?
  10. Any current projects you’re working on you’d care to share?

Thank you again to Jennifer and Karina for the nominations, and congratulations to those whom I nominated! I’ll be back blogging a new short story soon.

  • Thomas M. Watt

Social Media and #Pitmad Update

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Let me start out by saying I’m grateful to be here.

No, seriously. I’ve spent the last few hours fumbling my way through twitter, goodreads, and a few cover design pages. My last post outlined five goals for promoting my book. I’m happy to say I can check off all of them.

The big #pitmad event was today. Much thanks to Zara Kramer with Pandamoon Publishing for favoriting my pitch for Master, I look forward to querying you shortly.

Anyway, contacting potential cover artists was a piece of cake. I’m not too particular – if the portfolio looks professional, I’m in.

After that I logged some hours on goodreads. God I’m lost there. I posted in three different discussion threads, then updated my page with a worthless post. If you like laughing at clueless people, scroll down and read the comment that begins with “waddup goodreaders.” I don’t even know how to link directly to the post, but here’s one for my profile page. I’m sure all 1 of my goodreads friends can’t wait to check it out.

One of the big highlights of my day was having a few of my tweets retweeted. By some mega-twitter accounts and highly established authors, mind you – Carole Gill, J. H. Moncrief, and Charity Parkerson. Apparently they liked what I had to say. Or maybe they just thought my hopeless twitter account would give their hordes of followers a good chuckle. I really want to thank them properly, but I’m not yet educated about twitter etiquette. Do I say: Thanks for retweeting! @twitternamehere(?)

Please answer if you know how to solve this dilemma. I signed up to follow these word-weaving powerhouses, but feel obliged to properly express my gratitude.

Happy #pitmad day everyone.

  • Thomas M. Watt

First 5 steps to book marketing & MASTER Update – 9/9

indiana jones

Contrary to amateur belief, it’s most beneficial for an author to market their work before it is published. This way, potential readers will have something to look forward to, much like the opening weekend of a new blockbuster movie. That’s why we see trailers for movies that aren’t going to appear in theaters until much later; to generate some hype and anticipation.

If you’re like me, promoting your work is alien to your nature and feels like an insult to art (I am trapped by this deep-seeded ideal that beauty should be recognized the moment it is seen, and is apparent enough in itself that it should never have to be pointed out to anyone. Then I remind myself that Van Gogh never sold a painting).

Fortunately, the world wide web holds an endless bounty of information, and enough google searches will get you off the sidewalk and onto the main road. I owe a lot to Benjamin Myatt, author of the High Moon Rising series for pointing me in the right direction. His books have been downloaded several hundred times over. He recommended I check out this link, which led me to a free, downloadable PDF file that includes a checklist of the most effective ways to promote my book.

Now that I have a plan for marketing Master, I feel much better about my future as an independent author. It’s hard for any artist to accept, but nobody is going to buzz your doorbell to ask if you’re the next big thing. You’ve got to bang knuckles door-to-door and say, “Here I am.”

Below is my list of things to do today in order to get the ball rolling in the marketing department. Follow along if you’re in the beginning stages of promoting your work.

1.) Contact three potential cover artists (whose portfolios include covers for psychological thrillers)

2.) Create a list of keywords that describe ‘Master’, seek out blogs that express interest in those keywords

3.) Involve myself in an online forum without being called an idiot, getting booted, or giving out my address to someone who wants to help me receive an assault and battery charge.

4.) Figure out how Goodreads works (What’s this place for? Am I supposed to log-in when I read a book, then log-out when I’m done?)

5.) Figure out how to get more twitter followers.

* One final note, tomorrow (9/10/15) there is a #pitmad event on twitter that allows you to pitch your story to tons of literary agents. (write your logline in 140 characters or less and use the hashtag #pitmad). I plan on entering Master, and suggest you enter whatever story you’re currently working on.

  • Thomas M. Watt

Versatile Blogger Award: Feast Your Eyes Bitches

I've been nominated for this!  So exciting....

That’s right, I won it.

Versatile blogger award?? What’s that, you ask?

Oh. Ha. A ha, ha…ha. you don’t even know what it is.

Well let me fill you in on a few little details:

The versatile blogger award doesn’t just go to anybody. There is a lengthy process involved, and the qualifications needed just to be nominated are enough to make your head spin. Let me give you a little perspective by telling you what I went through to win this award. I warn you – the daily grind to keep this blog so fresh and clean might come as a shock to you.

– I wake up every day no later than 4:30 a.m.

– I look at my alarm clock and wait until I fall back asleep.

– I wake up again at 9:30 a.m., when my alarm bell rings. I press the snooze button.

– I wake up at 11:23ish and pop out of bed, do three or less pushups, then blast my walk-out song as I make my way to breakfast. (a walk-out song is the rap song that plays for professional baseball players when they approach the plate to hit.)

– As “Ice Ice Baby” blares through my studio apartment, I punch the air with a series of aggressive jabs, secretly hoping I’m beating the shit out of the ghost who can’t be touched but can still feel pain. You might think that’s stupid, but when a ghost haunts your place, you can either stand up for yourself or just pretend he’s not there. I’m not a ghost pussy, I’ll stop fighting when he stops stealing my socks.

– I sit down and pour myself a bowl of cereal. It comes in this enormous cardboard box filled with dozens of bowls of cereal. I have to shake it really carefully, because a lot of the time more than one bowl will pop out, and even when I do only get one, the cereal always spills everywhere.

– I grab the milk from the fridge, then cautiously pour it all over my kitchen table, over the pieces of cereal. I then lick up the cereal as fast as I can, or else my Reeses Pieces are going to waterfall over the edge and wind up on the floor. And I hate eating food off the floor. It’s a lot harder and you can’t even sit down.

– I get on my computer and post a blog entry.

That’s EVERYDAY folks! Except for the weekend when I need time to recover, obviously. But next time you think about spending one full year of your life training for the versatile blogger award, I want you to ask yourself: Am I really willing to wake up at 4:30 am, just to post a blog entry? Because if you’re not, I just don’t think you’re gonna cut it in the free-online-blog-one-vote-wins-it-copy-and-paste-your-own-trophy award category.

Thanks again for nominating me, Aunt Joanna!! :)))) Check out her blog, she’s an amazing writer and an even greater story teller come thanksgiving.

Anyway, this is the gift that keeps on giving. Because now I get to write 7 interesting things about myself, and then I’m supposed to nominate 15 other bloggers 5 other bloggers for this award. Here’s 7 things you didn’t know about me:

1. I’m exceptionally boring.

2. I like turtles.

3. English is my first language.

4. That’s all I got.

5. I like Emenim? Specially the song “When the music stops.” That song is bad-ass.

6. A New Kingdom, the book I wrote, has just been nominated for a Hugo Award in the science fiction category.

7. Number 6 was a lie.

And now, to nominate 5 exceptionally versatile bloggers:

1. His actual name is writeswithtools. That’s how confident his parents were that he’d be a literary genius, which he is. His blog features post-after-post of useful storytelling information. In fact, merely browsing through his blog for a few minutes will help you improve your own writing dramatically, and at the very least open your eyes to the techniques and devices all great story-tellers use.

2. Linda G. Hill. She is so versatile, she actual maintains two blogs – one where she writes about life stuff, the other where she writes fiction.

3. Amy Barlow. Aka sharp little pencil. She has been my friend since the beginning of my wordpress (good old mcwatty9 days), taught me that it’s “all right” and never “alright”, and is a genuinely smart and funny person. She writes a lot of poetry and is never afraid to speak her mind. I like that about her.

4. Mike Steeden. He rhymes about drunk tom-foolery with pure elegance. I want to get drunk with this man. I think there’s a lot I could learn from him… But more importantly, I think he’d be fun as fuck to go out with.

5. Misha Burnett. He’s a really good writer and has incredible insight into whatever topics he chooses to discuss. This is someone who puts a lot of thought into what he writes, which probably explains why his novel, “Catskinners Book,” is beginning to sell like hotcakes.

Ok, that’s it. Congratulations to my versatile blogger nominees, now you get to nominate 15 other bloggers and write 7 interesting things about yourselves!

– Thomas M. Watt

Author of “A New Kingdom”

Press Briefing – Sept. 2nd, 2013

(The reporters are all sipping on capri-suns and talking about how good the fruit punch flavor is. Several of them are eating lunchables, happily digesting bologna on crackers. The mood is light and hearty, until Bill whips out a pouch of gushers. Many of the other reporters get upset that he only shares with Snobert, who sits at his side. A new reporter enters the room, named Aaron, and catches the eye of most everyone else, as for some unknown reason Aaron is wearing whitey-tighties over his head. He has a nice suit on underneath, however. McWatty9 enters from behind the red curtain, stands behind the podium in order to address Wattie nation.)

McWatty9 – Ladies and gentlemen, people of the wordpress, I am happy  to inform you that my nation is expanding. We’ve taken in friends from countries all over the world, and have received visits from many countries I have never even heard of. I’m very excited about all this, but to say I’m not somewhat nervous would be a lie. As it stands, we’ve taken in one-hundred and twenty two followers. We have over a thousand views, and so many likes I feel super duper cool. I don’t have too much to say, other than I’m saddened by the recent drop in support from Sharplittlepencil, and very distraught by several former followers who have left us. For Sharplittlepencil, I’m setting up signs around the neighborhood that say, ‘Have you seen this blogger?’ And I am posting a picture of a woman with a pencil tucked over her ear. As for the followers who have left us, I have been flying around the world, finding out where they live, and throwing bricks into their windows at night. It is a very scary thing to do, and sends messages like, ‘Watch out for that brick that just flew through your window.’ Now then, the forum is open for questions.

Bill – (raises hand, finishes chewing up his delicious gushers, swallows down five at once, poses question) McWatty9, many of your original supporters are somewhat confused by the recent change in style. You’ve written more than a few post about God, which some of us don’t really want to hear, and you’ve become much more of a poet than a humorist. What is the reasoning for your recent change in style?

(McWatty9 nods, points finger confidently) Excellent question Bill. I’ve found that I enjoy putting poetry together, for the rhymes come quite easy for me. As far as God goes, I pretty much rely on Him for everything, and so I’m not about to deny that just to appease a few folk. Only a short while ago, I posted a short script about me hanging out with the Kardashian family. Shortly afterward, I published a post about me being on the bachelor. I don’t really know what happened, but the bachelor post bombed, and I just felt very sick about the whole thing. Sometimes I wonder if my humor is simply to childish and idiotic for others beside myself to enjoy. So in short, suck-it Bill.

Snober – (shouting back instantly) Many of your new supporters are not familiar with just how arrogant and profane you can be. Does it bother you too know that as your following grows you can no longer get away with such statements as ‘Suck-it’? It is a rude, classless thing to say, and I for one am always disgusted to hear you say such crude things. I liked the post about the horses, why not just stick with things of this nature?

(McWatty9 squints his eyes) Snobert, I think I’m speaking for everyone else here when I say, from the bottom of my heart, suck-it.

(Snobert appears outstandingly offended, then becomes really really sad, and then embraces Bill with a back-patting hug)

McWatty9 – Anyone else?

(Aaron, the new reporter in the back, with the fine-looking suit and whitey-tighties over his head, raises his hand)

McWatty9 – Yes, Aaron?

Aaron – Recently you’ve begun to post your quest for ’30 days of listening’. Yesterday, on day three, you neglected to continue this thread. Are you already finished listening? Don’t you realized the key to a good blog is all about consistency?

McWatty9 – Yes Aaron, thanks for asking. Yesterday, I did in fact fail to publish a post in continuance of my thirty days of listening. I didn’t have any in-depth conversations with anyone new, and I was simply too tired to write one up. I did expect to post two today, and label them ‘Day 3’ and ‘Day 4’ but now you’ve gone and ruined that. I shall do it anyways, I suppose.

Aaron – And another thing – in your recent air-strikes against enemy blogs, you’ve failed to be as aggressive as you should. You waste your bombs, you fly like shit, and you’re simply not very good.

McWatty9 – (Appearing greatly distressed) You know what Aaron, I don’t think anybody reading this will actually understand what any of that means. You are always so negative and so love to tell me what I do wrong. For that, I say unto you, suck-it Aaron.

(Aaron drops head, looks very sad)

McWatty9 – In summary, I am new to having an actual readership, and will do my best to bring my nation good content, while at the same time remaining true to myself and whatever ideas come to me. I am actively looking for more format, and specifically looking to give you all something to look forward to when you read my post. Consistency, I suppose. I am hoping to start up a short-story Sunday, and plan to form a routine something like poems in the morning, actual writing mid-day, and humor at night. These ideas are in the works, and I promise you the neurons in my brain are working overtime to create such a format on this blog. Thank you all for being part of Wattie nation, Aaron can suck-it, and I hope to bring you more quality content in the days and hours to come. Thank you for supporting this ever growing nation. Peace, I’m out.

(McWatty9 walks back behind red curtain, reporters all nod their heads and return to eating, several start a food fight, Aaron gets hit in the eye by a bite-size brownie and begins to cry)

Attention Bloggers

Does anyone know anything about WordPress? I believe it is time to take my blog to the next level. And by next level, I mean from amateur hour to half-decent homepage. As of right now, I don’t know anything about anything, and nothing about nothing. All I’m looking for is some advice to take this thing from embarrassing to a chuckle, so no overwhelming input like ‘digitize your quantosphere’ or stuff of that nature. I’m looking for, ‘click here, and then press that button, and presto!’ Specifically, I am getting a great many views on the home page/archives. I would like to get more view on specific postings I have published, yet nobody seems to click on them. Am I an idiot? Of course not. Do I want you to teach me as if I am an idiot? Well…okay. So shoot away tech-squad, feed me with your suggestions/valuable input/ complicated button clickings.

Thanks,

All of us at the McWatty9 technical center (two hands that can type pretty good)

McWatt News Alert

This just in – McWatty9 has zero views at this hour. We are two hours into the new wordpress day, a timezone which is based on Matt Mullenweg’s surf schedule, and has nothing at all to do with the sun or any actual timezone.

The results are still preliminary, but after a local survey with ‘The Watties’ here is what they had to say –

“McWatty9 is going downhill. His stats are plummeting, his genre is reckless, I am getting out NOW,” – top three commenter, chose to remain anonymous.

“Ah. For God’s sake. Stop bringing me into this blog. I don’t know what a McWatt is. You made fun of me last time so please just go away.” – That one guy from India who once mis-clicked onto my site.

“Mcwatty9? Oh, you shouldn’t worry about him! He’ll be fine. He is smart and funny, Oh-hoh-ho!” – King Everything Iz Great, United Kingdom

“Well, we were considering liking him, but then we saw some of his older posts, and decided we can’t just let any buffoon into our club. I say, no.” – sophisticated poet society

Well folks, you’ve heard the verdict – McWatty9, thought earlier this week to be ‘blowing up’, is now on the down and out. What was it that killed this once reputable blogger? What was it that brought his followers to such dismay? Many believe it was his recent venture into poetry, some say it was his posted thoughts on faith, and others believe the public simply had enough of his antics. But the facts are simple – the number of Watties are plummeting, and many fear McWatty9, or, ‘The Immature Humorist’, as the Laugh Track Times recently coined him, is diminishing in the polls. We will have an update later in the day, roughly around the hour Matt Mullenweg decided the universal day should end. Until then, keep staring at this screen and waiting for then to come.

WordPress

Dear WordPress,

I know we just met. I really do. But it’s been three days now, and I’m beginning to feel like we’re on a different page. I have no friends, only one comment, and every time I try to search for friends, you bring me to some ‘Matt’ guy who likes to surf and already has about fifty friend request from me.

I’ve given you many posts, I have, I have, but haven’t received a shred of feedback. I’m essentially posting blogs for myself to read.

Went to ‘Public Works’ page earlier today. They seemed like a good friend to make. A good connection. But you wouldn’t let me post a comment. You hid the button from me, wordpress, why did you do that?

And then, when I sought out small profiles so that I could connect with human beings, you showed me to a page called ‘Gravatar’. First off, they look nothing like aliens, second off, gravator makes me feel pressured to dress up like an alien for my profile picture. I just want a normal picture, wordpress, just a ‘Picture of yourself’ would have been great.

Well, back to exiting my blog, and waiting for friends and followers… Though I know nobody is coming, and I have spent so much time already trying to get others to come. But you suck, WordPress, because you make it so hard to do the things I try to do.

You suck,

Thomas M. Watt